Some personal notes.

I’ve decided I’m not going to argue with S.O. anymore.  Just worn out with it.  She wants to confront me, accuse me, argue and complain at me all the time.  So I’ve had it.

I smoked all the cured bud from my botany experiments, and it was fabulous.  But all gone.  Not sure whether I’ll attempt a grow again.  A cooling-off period in order, perhaps.

After being out in Durham for the vintage bikefest, I’m a little more comfortable going out next time.  The one alternative club in W-S reopened under new management, same place, probably the same crowd.  So a trip to the CO2 is now in order.  My figure has really improved with continued fitness and weight loss.  Oh, and all the smoking, I guess.

I have oral herpes, and have had since 1994.  I contracted it taking a few drags off a big fat joint at the Steely Dan Alive In America performance at Merriweather Post Pavilion in Maryland.  Since being diagnosed a number of months later, and by taking prophylactic doses of antiviral every day, I rarely have an outbreak.  Except when I am run down, overworked, overtired, and I push it just a little bit more.  A quick cross-country trip for work last weekend, a redeye flight back in our nation’s grubby, nasty, germy air travel transit system, and a raucous soccer match wherein I played 80/90 minutes in the heat, and WHAM!  Outbreak city.  No outward signs except my fatigue, but my Lymph glands under my chin become tender, my throat feels constricted and a little numb.  It came on me suddenly last Saturday afternoon, I did not recognize my symptoms at first, it having been 3-4 years since my last outbreak.  I thought I had caught a simple cold from traveling — I probably have a cold, I still have the runny nose, and sneezing, a dull headache.  Sometimes I can kill a cold by getting out and engaging in some vigorous exercise.  Oh, my, this time, it tipped me over the edge.  I knew when I woke up Monday morning that this familiar feeling was an outbreak.

Thank god this is very occasional, as it is unpleasant.  Before finding a medication, I would get large white open sores in my throat.  It was torture, sheer torture, I couldn’t stand it, my doctor saved me from that.  I have been so cautious about my condition with S.O. that in nearly 20 years of marriage, she has not been exposed.  I love her, after all, and wouldn’t wish this on her ever.  the dirty dogs that did this to me have no soul.  Sure, I took a couple drags from a stranger’s fat doobie — my choice, my bad.  Deserve this for that?   Ha.  If you think so, you’re a really unhappy, sadistic person that has  no empathy for ordinary human suffering.  Sorry, call it like I see it.

Wearing some simple black bikini panties with cute lacy legs under my jeans tonight, and my Amsterdam earring in, otherwise very drab tonight.  Not because I’m not feeling it – I am, but because I just didn’t have the energy as much as I want to.

So, a little treat from behind the curtain for you tonight.  Moi, en le couchez, as it were.  I could be accused of trying to make it worth the wait, probably some truth to that.  Mostly I have no one else who will listen to me.

Kisses – KM


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